Expats Everywhere Do It

If you're reading this and are not (yet) an expat, it probably stumps you a bit why there's so much complaining on our part about the countries we live in.  It can seem ungrateful.  Ugly American-ish (or British, whatever). 

There's a bit of that, of course.  The reality is that we're all used to doing things the way everyone else around us has done them for millenia, and finding out that millions of seemingly intelligent people do them completely differently, can make your brain explode just a little bit.

I've been guilty myself of a tad bit of complaining about Irish differences in the six years I've been here (remember, TV lies!), but here's evidence that it's all part and parcel of the expat experience.  And it doesn't matter at ALL where you go, you're gonna wanna rip somebody's head off once in awhile.  Even in lovely Sweden.

You Shouldn't Have!

Here's another unexpected, sweet but sometimes confusing difference in how things work over here.  "Work" pun intended!  I've never been to so many goodbye lunches or contributed to so many birthday/baby/goodbye gifts.  I'm attributing this to a strong cultural value placed on generosity, one that sometimes seems overboard to me coming as I do from an Americanized background.

Some examples:  a short-term contract worker ("locum") comes to the expected end of her time and everyone assumes there will be a lunch, flowers and gift.  An intern approaches the conclusion of his year-long rotation and lunch out with the whole team is a must, as is another collection around the whole building for a nice gift..  Milestone birthdays as well are marked by contributions, good food and expensive baubles.

Now, don't get me wrong.  Please don't.  I'm not stingy.  Nor do I have a heart the size of a shriveled peach.  I care about people. I really do!  I'm just not used to all this celebration and gift-giving for what I'd see as normal comings and goings.  In my previous life, work was work except for the special things (e.g., new babies on a close team, etc).  Interns come and go.  So do contract workers.  There's nothing really special about that.  Except... I must be wrong because here there is.

Case in point, a coworker and I just concluded running a group for parents as part of our overall service to our clients.  At the final session, we each received a card.  Very nice of you.  Thanks, but you really didn't have to.  I so wasn't expecting it!  Nor was I expecting... this:

Really?  Isn't this a little above and beyond?